Today and if you realise, I was almost not posting anything on this platform. Fortunate or unfortunate enough I would have Kenya Power to Blame for giving us shity services. Yes I will say that again, Kenya Power is giving us all shity services because perhaps they are monopolized. It all started mid last night. I creped from the kitchen to my working table. Put everything in order, yawned, stretched a bit then double tapped on my Asus kid to fire her up. Right in my mind I had composed my ideas in some flowing order. I wanted to write and deliver something for this day. Alas! Blackout. Damn B_l_a_c_k_o_u_t. Fuckin damn Black out
I run no tanning factory in that hood but whenever the gods of light are glim, that crib goes dark as that Thika Road tunnel. Then I can’t work for everything is hitched. Look, most of times I feel sorry that my life so depends on electricity so much. Why? A blackout means I can’t work because my age beaten Asus kid is no longer a pc but rather a plug to use desk top. The bat died mid-life and thus the thing only works when connected to power. No power no peace. Secondly, after the conventional basic needs I need Internet. For some reason nature has it that Internet is to be powered by electricity. Enter blackout exit internet.
There I was. Handicapped by Power blackout. No comp. No phone. No music. No light. Nothing. So I slept an angry man. Praying that the government intervenes; “serikali iiingilie kati” halloo am a Kenyanese! Waking up, the government had not yet noticed its intervention was needed as urgent as yesterday. Neither was nature in a hurry. It was still dark black everywhere. Now that was trouble. Real trouble because chaps were meant to start calling in over their works to some voice “am sorry but the mobile subscriber is no longer reachable”
“Alaaar! Did he ever mind tell you who the hell he tasked with delivering our jobs?”
The planning world was crushed. There I was a bunch of plan less citizen floating in a mass of Monday blues. So I drifted into the damn day like a headless cockerel. From one thing to another with no measurable progress. All thanks to the chaps of Kenya Power!
Look, on a good Saturday, and when the financial gods are appeased, we all pile into Jeymohs car (all refers to the boys; sijui seven of us) and waste the Saturday away at some joint on Ngong Road around the prestigious prestige mall. Some untarmacked path in between the mall’s fence and the super apartments to the right breast leads to that our joint. In there we do what normal naughty men will do. Watch ball, sip stuff, play pool, bite a piece or two of roast meat, officiate a fight once in a while, Argue over NASA, stare at girls from behind and talk about our ‘girlfriends’. The ending Saturday owing to my financial religion not allowing, I didn’t join the boys to that place. I missed out on all that ‘fun’ and in its place spent the whole day lazing, rolling left and right on the carpet wishing MASHUJAA day fall on 9th instead of 10th. Not that it means anything but what else does a broke guy think of?
Monday turning out plan less, I zoom that direction a board a moty. It takes less time like am in a hurry. I hate myself for that decision (of using moty instead of those time-tested mats that first traverse Kibra before dropping you there). That place looked gloomy. No taxis lining up for drunks. No people hopping in and out. I mean no activity. I walked in anyway and Alas! the whole lot of place burnt down the same Saturday I missed out! No casualties. Millions of worth properties lost. Sorry state. However small that place might have appeared, it was a full economy with a representation of every typical Kenyan business; a car park, car wash, several salons, a butcher, a pub, a nyama Choma joint name them. We lost a joint but come to think about it some people lost a life. There’s someone who sleeps, wakes up, showers, dresses and catches mat to that place to make a living out of there. Some washing cars. Others waiting at the bar yet more still opening there stalls for customers.
In that hood where I live I have well, funny neighbors’. Sorry hope none of their relatives reads this blog! Shhhh. A girl who stones often to the left and to the right a boy who comes home drunk late night to knock continuously on his door yet he lives alone! Now there’s this day our boy had taken enough of his addiction and his inner self told him life is worthy living no more. Guess what, he set his self on fire! Luckily enough, our stoning girl was still alert to notice unfamiliar smoke and the situation was saved. It was approaching morning. We all woke up and beat the alcohol out of his head and sat him down to the reality that there’s more to life than coming home drunk late night to knock on the door! He’s a changed man now.
What am I driving home to? No one knows when calamity strikes. None of us smells disaster coming. Yes, absolutely none, because on such a night save for the God of Abraham being kind enough to us (I guess most of us tithe or one of us is SDA) we were all destined to burn and die alongside our life_fed_up brother. Simple! We were marked and spotted for death. And we would have died with our aspirations. Personally I would have died with this story! Then angel Gabriel came visiting and here am a living example of ‘how I escaped death by a whisker!” Not so sure but it’s how the Insurance guys come in and some girl calls first thing in the morning
“Hi, my name is Virginia. Would you have a minute we talk?”
“Yes, I have three and a half minutes, Virginia”
(I mean she’s a girl plus I think it’s well, a blessing to talk to random girls first thing in the morning)
“Am calling from Jubilee. . .”
“.. . Yes I know Jubilee but which Jubilee are you calling from? Is it hustler’s party? The famous church or the Insurance guys ?”
(Laughs hysterically) “I think you are funny…”
“No, am not funny am Tony, sorry I didn’t introduce myself”
Ting! Ting! Ting! Hangs!
“Halloo. Halloo. Virginia are you there, I need Fire Insurance.. .