THE ROUND UP: March, Just Much to Talk about.



You know why March means much?….

You know why March means much? I bet yes but high school scholars said repetition is meant for all but emphasis or was it to drive the point home deep square? March is that month of the year when the year has just picked pace and all it says is “dudes, look am here to stay!” Roll eyes. No the main reason why March means much is because the start of March and end of March marks the wrap of the first quarter of the year. Alas! Three months have gone just like that. A year has 365 days for records sake. Sorry 366 for special cases such as 2016 to boot. Someone else will tell you why in a different lesson.

There happened to be an international women’s day around the eighth of March but all chaps in Nairobi confused it for Mother’s day save for the guys in upcountry who dint care that it exists to start with! Women’s and Mother’s day are two separate affairs for clarity sake. Here is the thing, one celebrates woman hood in general sense and the other celebrates womanhood on the criterion of child bearing. So someone joked that women day was slotted to happen sometime early in February based on history but the ladies weren’t prepared so it was postponed on and on till March since there was nothing much to wait for! Thus it happened right in the first week of March. What about the men? You ask. Who cares? The song is been women Empowerment ever since God was a teenager. The tale goes, my dear men were to have their day way before women, they forgot. Laugh. Lie. International Men’s day falls on the 19th of September. Please mark your calendars and let’s meet at the knees of Tom Mboya on Moi Avenue for discussions further ado. For the town new beis, Tom Mboya stands just right outside the historic Archives; the place where ardent Gormahia fans meet to appease the gods when they win clean against the lethal “ingwe” Make a date. Don’t be late. Solidarity for MEN! That’s man enough.

Politics kept on changing from hot to hotter. Scandals my ooh my! I bet that list won’t fit here but just in case you insist, take it upon yourself to get a print out at from the government printers next time the mat guys drop you at Agip instead of the scandal hit railways stage. That aside and instead one question. “Did you register as a voter? I presume you did. Change begins with you. Yes, you then me on the down line. On a similar note, the IEBC (Independent Electoral and Boundaries Commission) chaps decided that the famed “Okoa Kenya” dies an artificial death on oxygen machine survived by animal-like signatures. It’s the reason everyone says they should go but are they really going? Where?

You remember Ayub Shaka? He used to give us a preview of how the weather outlook would be in the coming days. So that perhaps we would take refuge or just look forward to the last minute. Aren’t we Kenyans? Nowadays no one bothers. To tell us such stuff off course! When they do they lie. You remember the Elnino hoax? All we do now is speculate. It’s how the equinox happened midway and the heat was just unbearable tough. We survived. We moved on. The hard times have taught us all that. We have hardened. In the face of trouble all we do is survive and move on.

Then came Easter. This time around not the usual April way but much earlier falling end of March. Am told some guys sit in the Vatican to determine those days for Easter Monday and Good Friday pegged on some timing of a full moon coming after the equinox and aint that rocket science? The chaps know the Easter dates already for the next Century! Do you?

8-4-4 Education system has staged thirty years and counting. Yet my friend MacOkoth.A.Ouma; the practicing Dentist still jokes that the system is an arithmetic that bears zero! Sure (8-4-4=0) but you won’t take him serious when you find out that the initial A in his name stands for a body part! Just the other day the 2015 KCSE results were released and recorded floods of A’s. A’s that every Tom, Dick and Jerry are complaining about. The fate of 8-4-4 system lies on loose balance. It’s all but a matter of time. Exit March. Enter April. The story Continues.



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